Being A Good Listener

A good listener tries to understand what the other person is saying. In the end he may disagree sharply, but because he disagrees, he needs to know exactly what it is he is disagreeing with.
"Effective listeners remember that "words have no meaning - people have meaning." The assignment of meaning to a term is an internal process; meaning comes from inside us. And although our experiences, knowledge and attitudes differ, we often misinterpret each other’s messages while under the illusion that a common understanding has been achieved."
"There is no such thing as a worthless conversation, provided you know what to listen for. And questions are the breath of life for a conversation."
To listen fully means to pay close attention to what is being said beneath the words. You listen not only to the 'music,' but to the essence of the person speaking.
You listen not only for what someone knows, but for what he or she is. Ears operate at the speed of sound, which is far slower than the speed of light the eyes take in. Generative listening is the art of developing deeper silences in yourself, so you can slow our mind’s hearing to your ears’ natural speed, and hear beneath the words to their meaning."
The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.
We listen in order to learn and retain information. If we are speaking, we are not listening or learning anything to add to our sum of knowledge. This is why the first step to effective listening is to stop talking!

Being A Servant

If you haven't any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble.
If we wish to be compassionate with our fellow man, we must learn to engage in dispassionate analysis. In other words, thinking with our hearts, rather than our brains, is a surefire method to hurt those whom we wish to help.
Serving others may leave you tired at the end of the day, but with it comes a sense of accomplishment and humility. When we serve others we find a new way to be happy. Serving is a thankless job the majority of the time, but it is also a reward in itself. Think of raising children. You have to serve and sacrifice everyday for your children, but they are also the greatest source of happiness in your life. Here are ways to get more out of life by serving others:
Complete possession is proved only by giving. All you are unable to give possesses you.
You will find, as you look back upon your life, that the moments that stand out are the moments when you have done things for others.
Being a servant is to give of your time, attention , and assistance of others needs.
So to be a good husband, I need not to be selfish with my time, and to give to my wife.
A father is to be a servant even to his children, giving them attention when they need it. seeing to their needs as they are in need,
And when friends are in need, find what ways you can assist them with your abilities.